In regard to helpfulness, Elias stresses the importance of acting out of a position of acceptance. There is an excellent session #529 about this topic, which explores helpfulness, but also covers compassion and suffering[?].
**Session #529**:
ELIAS: This is not to say that you may not choose to participate in that action, but your greatest expression of what you identify to be helpfulness is the expression of recognition — acknowledgment of the individual’s choice — and the lack of judgment, and not to be devaluing the choice that the individual has created. And in their expression and choice to be interactive with you, you may together choose in agreement an alteration of the reality, but not in judgment, but in acknowledgment that the experience has been created, it has been explored, and there is gain in that in essence, for it is an exploration of consciousness and all of its manifestations.
**Session #564**:
ELIAS: ….tolerance carries with it expectations.
JIM: Oh. (Sighing)
ELIAS: This is an automatic expression of tolerance. Tolerance is a temporary expression and it holds expectations. Whereas acceptance is a continuous expression and holds no expectations. And as you allow yourself to be examining these terms, you may also allow yourself to be examining your term of helpfulness.
You may be expressing energy as you are focused in your attention upon yourself, and it shall automatically be what you term to be helpful, in a manner of speaking, throughout consciousness.
But as to your physical definitions of helpfulness and the implementation of actions in conjunction with helpfulness, I shall express to you, as I have expressed to other individuals previously, examine YOURSELF. For the expression of helpfulness which you may offer which is NOT requested may not be helpful.
**Session #1163**:
ELIAS: You do not generate the choices for other individuals. Therefore, whatever [your mother] engages or generates she is choosing, for you do not create another individual’s reality.
But as you interact with another individual, it is significant to examine your motivation, for your motivation is directly influenced by your beliefs — which is not bad. It is merely significant that you examine these expressions and recognize what you are actually expressing. Your desire is to be helpful, and therefore your want is to genuinely express that and not to be distorting that.
Therefore, as you engage the other individual, if the other individual expresses a request to you to offer information or your opinion or an identification of your perception in relation to themselves, they have expressed an openness and a want of that type of interaction, which thusly you may be responding to that request.
But how shall you respond to the request? In expressing what the other individual should or should not or could or could not do? No, for this is not paying attention to you.
Holding your attention upon you, remembering the example of the straight little sapling which does not attempt to express directions to another little sapling, you may share your experience, your preferences, your opinions with the other individual in relation to yourself — which allows you the opportunity to share energy with the other individual.
But you continue to hold your attention upon self and you do not generate an expectation, a judgment or a dictation to the other individual. You also, in holding your attention upon self, do not express expectations of yourself to be generating solutions, for you allow the other individual to generate their own choices and their own solutions.
**Session #9999:**
ELIAS: The quick brown fox jumped over the lazy dog …